Home > Dashnine Media > I (may) need a new job because my boss is a jerk

I (may) need a new job because my boss is a jerk

February 24th, 2009

Dear _________,

I’m writing to express an interest to interview with your company.  I may need to leave my current situation.  I know its against convention to trash my last employer when applying for a job.  If you read this, I think you’ll understand and excuse my behavior.

For six months I’ve worked under the promise of an eventual pay off.  To date, I’ve received minimal compensation for my efforts.  The past three months, I’ve worked 12-14 hour days six days a week and my boss expects me to “stick it out” for success that may or may not come.   I know the hours for a fact.  When I had trouble getting things done he made me account in writing for how I used every hour of each day until I was in the habit of using company time wisely.

My boss doesn’t trust me.  He had me write a contextual spelling corrector.  I delivered on the product as promised with tests showing it worked and attesting to its accuracy.   I was so proud I even gave a talk to my local ACM chapter on the work I did.  He didn’t believe the results and he made me go back, generate new tests, and reevaluate the numbers.  This time he was right but it took a week away from the progress of the product.  Fortunately we institutionalized the test and evaluation process during this time.  Still, it was mind numbing staring at numbers for a week to add extra accuracy to a spelling corrector.

I’m often asked to complete tasks with no direction about where to start.  My boss is unwilling to mentor me and failed to set aside a training budget.   I’m always expected to get it done regardless.  Last I checked, he wants me to keep books, handle business paperwork, network and promote the business, design websites, write efficient code to process large sets of data, become an expert on linguistics, become an expert on machine learning, develop software in several languages, develop AND document a software service, test and fix defects, profile and improve scalability/performance, administer systems, create build and test processes, deal with outsourced help, provide technical support, come up with a marketing plan, and deliver on a high-level strategy.

The timelines my boss gives me are insane.  Any competent program management team would laugh him out of a room.  Still, he expects me to meet his goals.  Each week we sit down, go over last weeks goals, and set goals for the coming week.  I remember he gave me one week to design and build the back-end of our website.  He wanted it to accept payments, process accounts, and talk to our software service. He also wanted a sketch of a plan to scale our service infrastructure with EC2 when the time came.  What was my reward for completing these things on time?  More impossible deadlines for more complex tasks.

On the positive side, my boss believes in what we’re doing.   Through him I’ve learned time management, developed a belief in using metrics to measure progress, learned and applied graduate level computer science concepts, and have gained an appreciation for the soft skills that make a company work.

Starting this company and working for myself is, so far, the most rewarding and painful experience of my career.   My product is almost ready to launch.  My hope is the world finds it useful and I don’t have to send this letter.  If this letter has made it to your inbox, I’d like to ask for an opportunity to interview with your organization.  I have many skills, high standards, and can assume any roles necessary to help you succeed.  All I ask for is fair compensation, a warm location, some risk/reward opportunity, and that you get me away from this mad man that I work for.

– Raphael

Attachments
1. Resume

Dashnine Media

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  1. February 26th, 2009 at 01:44 | #1

    really well written and a pretty crisp and frank way to put it.

  2. February 26th, 2009 at 02:08 | #2

    Raphael

    Best cover letter I’ve read in years

    If your startup fails and you dont start something else we would probably love to have you collaborating for one of our ventures. Unfortunately I have a hunch that you wouldnt have trouble finding a job ;)

    Best of luck

    Luis Rivera
    Okuri Ventures

  3. February 26th, 2009 at 07:35 | #3

    It’s terribly clever, Raphael, but it’s way too long. You can cut half the sentences in that letter and it will still make sense. Brevity is the soul of wit, my friend!

  4. Jaime
    February 26th, 2009 at 10:45 | #4

    This is kind of on par for the work a co-founder of a startup does. You are getting co-founder-level equity, right?

  5. John
    February 26th, 2009 at 12:15 | #5

    Very creative. No offense though but I would never hire someone who sent me a cover letter like that.

    a) I don’t want a kidder, I want a straight shooter
    b) I don’t want to have to find hidden meanings/skills in a cover letter. I want them explicitly stated so I can find them at a glance
    c) You really emphasize the hardworking part (which is good) but at the same time, you make yourself seem unreasonable as a potential boss.

    It is hard to re-examine something that is so creative and unique but try to from fresh eyes. Who knows, maybe the cover letter is so different it will make you get noticed. However, when I do hiring though, I look for different things from a cover letter.

  6. February 26th, 2009 at 12:50 | #6

    @John, overall this “cover letter” was written as a joke. I sometimes use writing as an outlet for negative emotions. This time I felt some anxiety prior to launch and thought “what would I tell a future employer?”

  7. John
    February 26th, 2009 at 14:19 | #7

    ok, I understand. It was really clever. I’m sure with a little work, it could probably be something pretty handy to have.

  8. February 26th, 2009 at 14:20 | #8

    I have a feeling your boss is you?

  9. Jim
    February 26th, 2009 at 20:30 | #9

    @raffi
    Guess I don’t need to hound you for the 1000000th time to see if you want to come down here.. ;) I almost did till I read your comments.

  10. February 27th, 2009 at 16:27 | #10

    This is awesome! Thanks for writing it — and I wish you the best in your current endeavor.

  11. February 27th, 2009 at 22:57 | #11

    Indeed a cool one IMO
    :P

  12. September 9th, 2009 at 00:16 | #12

    You still working in AtD?

  1. March 2nd, 2009 at 08:52 | #1
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